Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Thinkin' Lincoln

*blows dust and spiders off of computer screen with glove, and takes a little polite bow*

Hello my loyal readers and thanks for sticking around while I went on an internal journey to find myself (SURPRISE!). Boy, what an eventful couple of weeks it's been, huh? I can smell the history in the air.

What's that?


Well! Here's a historical comic for you. Oh dear! It looks like it's not a very good one, though...

Where do I even begin to discuss what goes wrong behind the scenes of this comic? (before you ask, the behind the scenes is as much a part of the art as anything) It seems like Miles Grover is a guy who just made up some stuff about some presidents and he said, "You know what? I'm going to call it a night!" And then that's what his comic is.


Looks like we've caught Grover with his digital pants down on this one. Wow. What a display of bad ineptitude. This comic could be written by six fourth-graders working in a committee that doesn't work very well together and takes breaks to eat [fruit] snacks. Yes, this is not even truly a comic. It's the ashes of one. It's a burned out husk of a Bazooka Joe misfire that was probably plagiarized from Laffy Taffy and it's obviously for Dum-Dums and Nerds. (Tried to work Twizzlers in there, but couldn't. Sorry!)

OK, all joking aside, you want to know the real problem? This comic just does not stand up to multiple readings. Observe the following panel:

OK, so this is not a bad panel really, right? I mean, you can read this comic, and after you've read it, you won't feel the urge to get up offa that thang and put on some CDs that your brother left in your room by mistake, and that you would never actually buy, right? Of course! But anybody can make something that isn't horrible once. This panel, like all Thinkin' Lincoln panels, overstays its welcome when you see it--oh, I don't know--Nine times?

Do you see what I mean? If you actually read the panel all those times, then you probably hate it by now, and if not, then you were probably using the technique of staring through it rather than looking directly at it. (old trick)

OK, that's all I have to say about the writing, but what about the art?

The art is just heads.

Sound familiar? Oh yeah. Duh. Evolution (see prev. review). Great, it's good to know that these bad webcomic authors have the ability to rip each other off like a bunch of monkeys with typewriters ripping off Shakespeare. Good job, guys. Yeah, real good.

That's enough. I'm drained.

(~~~~~Sonty Mick~~~~~)