Sunday, December 16, 2007

White Ninja Comics

OK so there is going to be something a little different today. I know this might come as a large surprise to a good many of you, but I, Sonty Mick, am taking a night class from community college. Maybe you thought I was too old for college. Nope. You are never too old to get a little more of the good stuff (education). I am hoping that I will become an even better writer from this, and win even more awards.

Anyway, I am taking a class about writing good papers. It is also about editing them and researching them. I have sort of a brief research paper due, and so this next post will actually be my paper! I just submitted it for grading, and I will definitely let you know how it goes. It was hard because I was not allowed to write in first person.

Argumentative Paper
(((==~||~~{Sonty Mick}~~||~==)))
Advanced Composition

White Ninja Comics is So Bad

Every day days get just a tiny bit longer. You don't notice it, because I think that time gets slower or something too so it's the same from your perspective, but nothing can go fast forever. Famous people have said quotes about that kind of thing, but I couldn't find it online, and I seriously spent 45 minutes in the library and it was a total waste of time.

There has been a pretty good amount of discussion, a decent amount anyway, on what it is that makes a work of fiction a good one or a bad one. Sometimes that work of fiction can even be a comic that may be good or bad (Versaci 34), such as Blondie or Powerup Comics. It may be hard to believe, but the comic could even perhaps be considered a webcomic if it on the world wide web (internet).

It is one of these online webcomics that we must turn our heads to in focus with the lasers that make up the point of our eyes. Only in looking beyond ourselves can we find the rich resources that comics will provide for us on the web. It is on this web, which is like a sea of information, only withoout the sea and with more information, that we will find the topic that requires discussion here: White Ninja Comics.

In this paper, it will be proven through a good argument that by objective standards, White Ninja Comics is to be considered a bad webcomic. It is a bad webcomic for three reasons: The first reason is that the comic is written in a style that does not have literary depth, the second reason is that the comic looks like it came out of a butt, and the the third reason is that the characters in the comic are too hard to tell apart from each other, and most of them are ugly. There are other reasons, but hey, who even cares? I am not getting payed by the word here (that's an old writing joke. I don't need to cite it because I think it's a part of our cultural consciousness.)

First of all, I think that someone had better shed some light on the matter of web comics and and the web in general. The internet is sometimes a difficult concept to understand. What is it? Where did it come from? Well if you are confused about the internet, then maybe you need to understand the extent to which the internet is used. Here is a graphical representation from Wikipedia about how many people around the world use the internet:

As you can see, the internet is a network that reaches all over the world, and people from differrent cultures are able to use it for whatever they want, including comics. Webcomics are just comics that are on this network, and include a lot of different big names in comics. There are even certain blogs that are all about webcomics and whether or not they are good. (Mick)

OK, the first reason that the comic is so bad is that there is no literary depth in the style. There is a lot of information available about metaphor in writing, and it's easy to get bogged down by it, but here are the basics of metaphor: Metaphor is something that is often used in literature and if it is done well then it can be very good. (Polvinen 55)

What kinds of metaphor can we find in White Ninja Comics? In the installment entitled "White Ninja Eats a Dead Man" we see one end of the scale. Here the ninja character is just being himself and just giving you a taste of what makes his world the different version of our world that it is. Do you notice anything about the literary depth here though? I think you will need to look hard, but if you do you will see that there is not a lot. When the officer shows up we are not even treated to an interesting piece of dialog. It is just White Ninja speaking without developing his character.

What does it mean to be human? White Ninja Comics could have answered that question in the episode entitled "White Ninja's Robot Wife", but that did not end up happening. While the comic strip makes an attempt at answering the question by blurring the lines between woman and machine, White Ninja is more interested in eating chicken than he is in giving us a glimpse into the transcendant. It does not answer, or even seriously consider the question of what it means to be human, and this is a major downfall from many perspectives. (Hand 11)

In the episode called "White Ninja's Pig" we get what should be an opportunity to examine the relationship between mankind and the animal kingdom. It is important for a comic to make a good point and this comic does not do that. (Polvinen 113) In this particular strip we get what seems like an ordinary exchange between these guys, but they are really having an exchange that has a lot of tension even though it doesn't seem to be sexual tension. Maybe the tension here is trying to be a metaphor for sex. It doesn't work.

And so as you can clearly see, White Ninja Comics has no literary value at all. Might as well just read nothing.

The second point about White Ninja Comics that needs to be understood is that the comic looks literally like it was drawn with a butt rather than with a hand. This is because the art is so ugly, and because butts are not very good for writing. There are no scholarly sources about how good butts are for writing. It is a field that most scientists are uncomfortable to do experiments about.

In the White Ninja Comic entitled "White Ninja In: Hottie Alert", White Ninja seems to think that a certain woman is hot. Well he must have strange taste in women or something, because the women that we see all drawn up here is not an attractive one. She has saggy boobs. Research online will show you that even if White Ninja comes from Japan (the land of ninjas) then even in his culture, saggy boobs are not considered attractive. It looks like this is a clear instance of the art not living up to what one would expect. (Physical Attractiveness)

In the installment called "White Ninja Doesn't Like to Drink", we see the eponymous ninja is having a cup of flour, which appears to be nice. What is happening in that fourth panel though? White ninja has closed his eyes, and even though this could be considered a symbol of blocking out the outside world, he is actually saying something that he wants to communicate with the outside world. So this piece of artwork is actually misleading, and it actually hurts the argument that some people might make that White Ninja has OK art. (Meskin Par. 4)

Also if you read the rest of the comics you will notice that they are also really really ugly.

So, as outlined here, we are made aware that the artwork in this comic is really bad, and it should not be looked at by anybody. Especially real people like you. Who knows what could happen? Maybe you'd even have to go to a funeral.

OK so the third point that absolutely needs to be made here is that the characters in this comic are too hard to tell apart from each other, and it's impossible to tell which one is which. The most obvious example that I could possibly think of is that there are probably several characters who are white ninjas but they are clearly not the same guy. Like look at the comic entitled "White Ninja Longs to Be Married" and you will see that White Ninja wants some chick to propose for him then it is unclear if he proposes to a guy or if he is just joking. But then in "White Ninja's Wife Gives Birth", he is completely married to a woman who is giving birth.

These two White Ninjas look the same.

There are a bunch of other examples but they are completely boring and if you actually care about any of this crap then you can just go ahead and research it all by yourself because I have seriously done enough research. Seriously, Go see some things for yourself, Don't be caged in by a society that tells you that you need a lid for a sprite when you go to a Mc D's.

In conclusion, White Ninja Comics is very bad, and the three reasons that it is so bad is because the writing has no literary depth, because the art is as horrible as crap, and because the characters all look exactly like clones of each other, and I don't mean actual science clones because they don't always look just like the original (Skipper par. 6). I mean sci-fi style clones.

Thank you for reading my paper.

Works Cited

Bevan, S, and Earle, K. White Ninja Comics. 2002-present.

Mick, Sonty and Satiricus, Gaius. These Web Comics are So Bad. (Award winning credible source)

Polvinen, Merja. "The Ends of Metaphor". European Journal of English Studies, Dec 2007, Vol. 11 Issue 3, p273-284

Versaci, Rocco.
This Book Contains Graphic Language: Comics As Literature. Continuum International Publishing Group. London. 2007

Hand, Elizabeth. "Writing Literary Science Fiction". Writer.
Jan95, Vol. 108 Issue 1, p11, 4p

Meskin, Aaron. "Defining Comics?". Journal of Aesthetics and Art Criticism. Oct2007, Vol. 65 Issue 4, p369-379, 11p

Skipper, Magdelina. "In the News: More than Nine Lives". Nature Reviews genetics. Apr2002, Vol. 3 Issue 4, p234-234, 1p

"Physical Attractiveness". (15 December 2007). In Wikipedia, The free encyclopedia. Retrieved December 15, 2007, from

"The Internet". (15 December 2007). In Wikipedia, The free encyclopedia. Retrieved December 15, 2007, from


Anonymous said...

OK, bad logic, bad grammar, bad writing style and bad choice of topic... I hope you didn't actually submit this, because this is a classic F paper.

Anonymous said...

white ninja is probably the most genius thing on the web. if you'd quit being so academic and learn to laugh once in a while maybe you'd come somewhere close to understanding that.

Anonymous said...

Sonty, that is the best literary paper EVER, bar none. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise. I think this means you need to get more awards, and also get to speak at universities and stuff. (There's an official term for getting to speak at universities and stuff, but I forgot what it was. Sorry.

Anonymous said...

Okay I am a professor a community college and Sonty, let me just say that was the worst paper i have ever read. If I got this paper from someone in my class I'd probly send them back to the 3rd grade because that is where they belonged.

If you ever get serious about really learning to write you should come to our college and we'll teach you how real writers write.

Diane Heaton said...

skulldemonz said: "Okay I am a professor a community college and Sonty"

You left out some commas.

the baber said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Sonty Mick you don't even write in proper APA style that is how bad you are what are you studying in community college how to write a paper that isn't even in APA style?

more like liberal arts college

Anonymous said...

I like how you experiment how you write your blog
I liked this one but I think past revieuws have been better.
I still think the wonderella one with the coffin going into the grave is genious

Anonymous said...

You're taking the piss, right?
White Ninja Fans: At least one.

Anonymous said...

i think that white ninja comicks are bad because they dont look good and sometimes i do not get the joke
i think that songy nick is good bacuse of what he said
i love you sogy nick

Anonymous said...

How could any teacher grade this. It would blow them away! A++, definitely. I feel sorry for your classmates who have to compete with this high caliber work. Amazing!

Anonymous said...

Mick, stop trying to make yourself look smarter then you really are. We can tell in your articles that you have no life and no sense of humor or imagination. This just looks to me that you only know how to be negative and sound midly sarcastic when trying to be positive. I'll say this next thing, Sonty Mick style: Go outside, have some air, go to a fast food resturant, see the good side to this rotten burger.

Maybe you should find something better to do then just hunting down comics and bluntly naming all the small things that you consider deathly stupid and same as everything else. You really are a moron, Mick.

Anonymous said...

Your fake reviews are shite, mate. Keep dreaming of being the next Something Awful or The Onion or Maddox or whatever the fuck you're trying to do, because it isn't going to happen. You're not funny.

Anonymous said...

It seems mean to jump on the trash-talk bandwagon, but I think everyone commenting here has a point. Apart from the writing style/grammar issues, I think you could perhaps best improve this paper by addressing the holes in your argument. You quote various sources, but without really utilising the information. For example:
"It is important for a comic to make a good point and this comic does not do that. (Polvinen 113)"
... you don't explain why it does not make a "good point". Such terms should be strictly defined, and any statements should be backed up.
This comes across as a personal rant, rather than a scholarly paper. Perhaps you would prefer to stick to genres that require the informal register.

Anonymous said...

I'm kind of appalled by the fact that no one seems to get what you're doing *at all*. I guess that's the point, though?

Anonymous said...

That was terrible.

Anonymous said...

ADHD idiots like Sonty who are too dumb to understand humor more complex than a half-episode of Looney Tunes do not deserve to have their thoughts put into words. You are a disgrace to humanity and a waste of good oxygen. Kill yourself.

Anonymous said...

you have at least fan here from me. surprised no one got the article.

Unknown said...

This is a joke right?

Anonymous said...

I'd give it a D. You didn't talk specifically enough about why it was bad. You gave vague reasons which anyone could have made up. It had no creativity, and was really weak mate.

Anonymous said...


Not a very good paper. You can't say WN is "scientifically" a bad comic. That's an opinion. Yes there are many ways they could have taken the subject of the relationship between man and animal. But why would they? What comic have you ever seen that would do that and be funny, and be successful. Besides having stupid logic, you have impeccably poor grammar. I hate you. I hope Candlejack eats you for bre

Anonymous said...

"It does not answer, or even seriously consider the question of what it means to be human, and this is a major downfall from many perspectives." I guess they weren't thinking about how to answer that question before it had been asked. Maybe you and the other retard Eric can go and enjoy some childrens programming, as that seems to be the limit of what you can "get".

Anonymous said...

You are a poor writer, plain and simple. Never should one use such a casual style in writing a paper! You assume the audience knows what you mean and how you mean it without giving any in depth talk, except for "oh this looks bad" and "there are multiple White Ninjas".

Have you ever seen a cartoon before Sonty? There is a reason that the characters can blow themselves up and still appear in subsequent episodes...because it's a cartoon, a moving comic.

You are an idiot, for previously said items, and I challenge you to rebut to this.

I am no writer, I am in Engineering actually, and I promise you that you will not get a good grade on this paper. If you do, I suggest you go to a better College

Anonymous said...

Wow, I have to say I couldn't actually read this through. The main reason? It is incredibly boring. It seems much more directed toward complaining than creating a decent piece of writing. Other than the obvious poor writing style, I don't think White Ninja should be analysed. It's there to have a laugh and not be torn apart. If you like it, great. If you don't, why bother writing about it when it's of no interest to anyone. Move on.

Anonymous said...

just horrible.

pd: the comics you linked are awesome, if you can get them is not our problem

Anonymous said...

Why say its bad whe you show them links? EH?

Plus people don't really care about your opinion on the Internet, I'm All For Free speech, But I Don't care About You're Opinion On A Comic, A Comic Doesn't Have To Be Perfect In Every Way So .!..(^_^) Write About Something More Interesting

I Have An Opinion, But You Don't See Me Putting Up a Whole Webpage About How Bad So and So Is

Get A Life, And Learn To Write About Something Useful.

And I Don't Want To Hear, "I'm Expressing My Views" Or Something Like That Or Even "I'm Doing It For College Work" You Don't Post Work O n Websites

Anonymous said...

So, basically, you attempted to reason humor out of a comic. Do you not see the irony in that? Also, that was quite poosibly some of the worst wirting I've ever rad. It was a poor topic choice no matter what. Why would you want to prove how not funny a relatively unheard of comic? Rethink everything. Not to say I disagree with you, White Ninja's normally not funny, though it certainly has its hilarious moments. Anyway, just think through what you're writing and why next time.

Anonymous said...

Nice work I think you will get a good mark. Your analysis was great, it does look like the comic was written by a butt.

Anonymous said...

I think white ninja comics are ok as long as you separate the difference between him and you "just because white ninja does it doesn't mean I have to" so yeah thats how I feel

Anonymous said...

Good God white ninja comics are horrible. They have no point at all and horrible artwork. I can't believe they got such a following. If you want to see some funny web-comics then go to But this is just my opinion so no one get your tampons soaked over what I said. I'm sure we can all agree on thing. That the Westboro Baptist Church protest videos on Youtube are hilarious. And the paper was quite horrible.

Anonymous said...

you just dont know. white ninja is hillarious why does it matter if it makes sense or not. as for the drawings they are actually very well put together if you look at the characters facial expressions they are so good. I think the three points of your argument are completely retarded because number one why should it really matter if a web comic has literary depth and also your last 2 points are pretty much the same your complaining about how the characters look and the animation saying them both in your argument is just redundant you can say the animation is bad so what if all the characters look the same. I would also wonder about the creditability of your collage if they are allowing you to write your paper about a webcomic I mean its on the fucking internet man

Anonymous said...

How could you possibly rip on White Ninja?
You can't. You proved it with your F-- (Eff Minus, Minus FYI) garbage you call a paper.

Anonymous said...

The fact that you wrote a paper about White Ninja just proves you need a life... or a better one.

P.S. your face looks like it was drawn with a butt

Anonymous said...

To all those who asked if this is a joke; indeed it is. Likely the author is an avid fan of white ninja. He is simply positing such a weak argument criticising white ninja. Anyone who is undecided or remotely intelligent instinctivey rails against the weak and humorously transparent critique of white ninja, bringing more people into the pro-whiteninja camp. It's called straw-menning- wherein you portray your opponents argument in such simplistic and ridiculous terms that it is easy to refute (see any far right or far left politician). Ergo straw-men: easy to construct, superficial resemblance to reality and even easier to knock down than to build up.

Anonymous said...

I don't know what the last guy just said but I hope he wasn't trying to sound intelligent. Big vocab doesn't impress anyone.

Anonymous said...

I love it how many College proffesors there are googling things to potentially grade.

I also love that the are called things like 'SkulldemonZ' so you'll forgive me if i wouldn't trust you to grade me.

Anonymous said...

And yes, I made spelling mistakes...because i'm not actually a teacher

Anonymous said...

these comments are quite heated.
no one should take the article personal,
every one,s taste varies.
white ninja jokes are actually kinda lame but that,s the beauty of them .i love and always look forward to them.
you just have to be that kind of person who with a screwed sense of humor.
if you,re like straight humor or wit ,white ninja is not for you but
i dare say that president Lincoln would have loved white ninja.i say this from a proper sturdy of the kind of jokes and yarns he told and anecdotes he wrote.
they were ribald and treading the line of taboo for that era.
that,s my two pence,thank you

Anonymous said...

i think that you are bad at posting stuff. ANYTHING you post is crap. i aint sayin i like this, but you need to go back to th 4th grade.

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Anonymous said...

I'm in a love-hate relationship with virtual memory because of how prices are always falling. I hate buying SD Cards for my R4 / R4i at (what seems to be) a cheap price only to see it become ten percent cheaper a few weeks later.

(Submitted by NetBlog for R4i Nintendo DS.)

Anonymous said...

Thank you for taking the time to make an paper about white ninja because it's really good and if you took the time to research on it then that means you're a bit of an fan too.

I love you.

Anonymous said...

i dont see the point

custom essay papers said...

Really the blogging is spreading its wings rapidly. Your write up is a fine example of it.

Anonymous said...


a lovely corpse said...

Ugh... couldn't get past the stupid "I don't get payed by the word" comment. It's not "payed", it's paid.

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Anonymous said...

White Ninja comics are literally the greatest literary works of all time.
go play in traffic..................

Anonymous said...

You're a terrible writer. Your paper is bad and you should feel bad.

Will said...

Very funny. Enjoyed the pissed off comments. Surprised fans didn't get it.